Sunday, March 05, 2006

Great Expectations

Squaresis #3 (my neice's mama) is expecting baby #2 in less than a week! Everybody’s favorite question of course, is what are you having? Well, squaresis doesn’t know. Not because she didn’t have a sonogram to find out…she had like three…but apparently the baby wants to surprise everyone as s/he kept h/er/is legs closed nice and tight in order to keep us all from knowing. This babies gonna be a trickster I can already tell! Well needless to say, SquareSis has been quite exhausted, taking care of a highly energetic two-year-old, running a cloth-diaper making and selling business as well as being nearly nine months pregnant and all, and has yet to decied on a name for the baby. This has proven quite disturbing for some of her friends…”How can you not know?”, “I think you should make it your goal to decide on a name today”, “Aren’t you worried that you don’t have a name yet?”. These are statements and questions that she hears regulary.
She was sharing with me her frustrations over everyone elses frustrations about her not having chosen a name yet, and I was reminded about how other people always have ideas and expectations about where we are supposed to be in OUR lives. I shared with SquarSis about how a few months ago, when I was at the wedding of a college friend I braced myself for the all too familiar question I get at every wedding I attend of “When is it gonna be your turn?”, when my friend Beth, who I was a bridesmaid for five years ago leaned towards me and said “I always brace myself for people to ask me, ‘when are you gonna have kids?’”. I have always known this, but at this moment, I further realized that it never-ever ends. Other people are always going to have expectations and opinions about where you are supposed to be in your life, and for some reason it bothers them more than it bothers you that you are not where THEY expect for you to be. I think the question needs to be asked more often is “Are you happy?”.

I advised my sister to come up with a really awful, ridiculous and ugly name and when people asked her what she planned on naming the baby tell them that name and amuse herself with how they respond.

That is what the little imp in me would do. I’ve had a lot of practice defying expectations.

11 Comments:

Blogger Kristina Chew said...

With great results I'd say! "Squared Sibling" perhaps? We know plenty of people who've chosen to "be surprised"----she's right to take her time as a name has to last a lifetime!

12:01 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Is that you Alana??

2:00 PM  
Blogger SquareGirl said...

and you would be...?

2:16 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Triangle girl.

4:19 PM  
Blogger SquareGirl said...

Anonymous...that doesn't help...oh well.

kristina, we're all pretty square! exactly, that's what I tell her. I've heard of people waiting for the baby to be born to make sure the name fits, and I have to say that I think that's lovely!

4:29 PM  
Blogger Octoberbabies said...

Oh!! Oh!!! I've got a story!!!! When my mom-in-law was pregnant with her second child, she was SURE she was having a girl. Tests said so and everything. She prepared a pink room, got pink bedding and a cute pink take-me-home outfit for her new daughter whose name would be Tiffany. You can imagine everyone's shock when she gave birth to a big, beautiful baby BOY!!!

Sitting in the hospital with her new (un-named) son in her arms, she picked up the little pink outfit and looked at the tag on it which read "The Bryan Baby Co."

Guess what my brother-in-law's name is? :-D

6:21 PM  
Blogger SquareGirl said...

Sal, I LOVE that story!!!! thanks so much for sharing it with me! Did Bryan have to wear pink for the first year of his life?

I can't wait to see what squaresis has! I think somehow, he/she will find a way to reveal his/her name to us!

10:25 PM  
Blogger Minka said...

I hear you! But the problem is if we finish one expected goal another expectation is formed immediately.
If you get a husband, you must have a bay next, and once that is accomplished you must buy a house...it is never-ending. Unfourtunately I haven´t come up with a snippy answer yet. But I will, ´caus eit is getting boring.

5:31 PM  
Blogger Minka said...

Oh I forgot to mention: In Iceland the baby recieves its name at the baptism a couple of months after birth. Until then it is only known to the parents and everybody enjoys a bit of guessing. :)

5:36 PM  
Blogger SquareGirl said...

Monika, I hear you...that is exactly my point. It gets kinda silly...I have some great ones that I'll share with you sometime, one for example is "what kinda girl do you think I am?". My goal is to get rid of double standardds by shocking one person at a time!

I will pass that tidbit of info to squaresis! That sounds fun for everyone to have to wait!

6:34 PM  
Blogger Minka said...

Besides, the church has never seen as much a turn up! Everybody wants to know the baby´s name and if that mean hearing it at church, well that is where tehy´ll be :)

9:44 PM  

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